Figuring Out Why Millennials Aren’t Going Towards Federal Work

Millennials confused

Federal employers want to make a lifetime commitment, but millennials want to have an open relationship when it comes to the job market. And for good reason.

 

 

Millennials.

 

The generation that brought you Skrillex, selfies, and because we don’t believe in vaccinations, small pox.

 

Recently a survey by the nonprofit group Partnership for Public Service found that employees under the age of 30 only made 6.6% of the federal workforce. To give you an idea of how big of a drop-off that is, back in 2010 those under the age of 30 consisted of 9.1% of the federal workforce, making it a 45,000 worker decrease in five years!

 

This massive drop-off would be fine if this was your friend’s shitty-Dubstep remix of Take Me to Church and not the future of the US federal government.

 

But we shouldn’t worry, because the Partnership for Public Service has an idea on why this dip in millennial participation took place. Max Stier, the President of Partnership for Public Service, believes the drop-off can be explained due to the lack of internship programs. He says, “the federal government brings in a tiny number of its entry-level hires through student internships, but there’s no substitute for 8-to-12 weeks of hands-on experience to understand what a person is like in a work environment.”

 

Ok I take it back, it’s time to panic.

 

man jumping out of window

 

Ok listen up federal government, it’s not the lack of unpaid internships that are making millennials hesitant to enter the federal workforce. It’s the lack of money you’re paying us. And I’m not saying it has to be competitive with the private sector. We get it, you can’t hand out the same government benefits as you gave our parents and grandparents years ago. But come on! I’d like to work for you AND be able to splurge on buying actual Cinnamon Toast Crunch once in a while.

 

CinniMiniCrunch

“GO FUCK YOURSELF CINNI-MINI CRUNCH, WE ALL KNOW YOU’RE A SUGARY FRAUD!!”

 

Or how about helping us with our student loan payments? Have you seen them? They’re really expensive! The last letter from the loan office was the nicest way anyone has ever said, “fuck you, pay me!!”

 

There are legitimate ways to attract millennials to government work, but sadly internships aren’t one of them.

 

"We know federal government. We know..."

“We know federal government. We know…”

 

 

(Photo Credits: Google Images)

 

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